So this is my ‘End Of The Road’ installment. Odin and I have to part ways. The day I decided I needed a van, I knew the right one would come to me. I feel like I found the best partner to help me get through the shittiest thing that had happened in my life so far. I can’t believe it was only a year and a half ago; so much has happened and my life is on a whole new path.
When I tried to return to my life in Brooklyn, I knew I was never going to settle back in. I didn’t sleep in my loft for the first two months I was back more than a handful of times. I still kept my bed made in Odin, and was more comfortable there than anywhere else. I didn’t feel at home in Brooklyn anymore, and I was escaping as often as possible to camp out anywhere within a few hours drive. Clem and I put a lot of miles in and Odin gave us a safe place to snuggle up at night. Not too long after I’d returned, the shop I worked in lost the lease on the building it was in, like so many other shops in the area. Then, I was presented with a great opportunity. I could move upstate, still work in the shop, and help my friend build her dream business. It was tough, deciding to leave the city. I never thought I would, but at the time, it felt like the thing I had to do. So I did. I’ve been here almost 6 months now, and it feels right. I am also renting to own a little house on almost 10 acres that I get to redesign myself, and eventually turn into the communal campground/bed and breakfast situation that I’ve always dreamed of running. Now, I don’t have to escape anymore. I just need a truck to haul me and my supplies. Coming to that conclusion really sucked. After I said it out loud for the first time, I sobbed every time I drove Odin anywhere. I know he’s just a van, but the journey I’ve been on with him has been enormous, and I know my dad was riding shotgun the whole time. It hurts to let him go. But it’s the right thing to do, for myself, and for him. He needs someone to take proper care of him, and keep him on the road. The new journey I’m on isn’t going to allow me to be that person.
It was exhilarating to think of being a nomad forever…just me, my pug and the open road…but building a real home for the first time in my life is way more thrilling. I’ve owed a house before, but it never became my home. This time I think I got a shot.